(These get it - Unconditional Love - ahhhhh)
Unconditional love is a term that means to love someone regardless of one's actions or beliefs. It is a concept comparable to true love, a term which is more frequently used to describe love between lovers. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unconditional_love
This word has become another one of those clichéd and over-used words amongst many other words which in their simplicity have very profound meanings . Words which not only empower, carry impact and emotion, but which define a richness of humanity’s core essence, a platform upon which standards and values are created and built on. Yet many of these words have been reduced to a drizzle of their former meanings.
Love, more so unconditional love is a gift which many of us never experience in life, because society dictates that conditions are placed on this feeling. A feeling which embodies healthy communication, honesty, integrity, friendship, unity, togetherness yet individuality. How we experience receiving and giving love is usually dependent upon various factors i.e our parents, upbringing, life experiences, our perception of life who we think we are etc, etc.
Therefore, many people lower their standards in order to accommodate sub-standard levels of love which can often be dictated by control, manipulation and conditions, disempowering our true authentic selves, where we loose our sense of identity. Yet, to be fair, because we all seek to be loved individuals will put up with even a little bit of love.
Unconditional love has nothing to do with power, nor manipulation. It is not about switching your emotions on when you feel like it and then turning them off. Unconditional love is a forever feeling in constant flow. When we learn to stand within our own truth and understanding; when we learn to truly love who we are, without external things defining who we are such as status, an over-extended ago, then we will not only receive unconditional love and understand its concepts, but we can also give unconditional love and know that we deserve it.
Many have learned to live with abuse in the name of love and therefore have tendencies to believe that this is a norm. Whilst others feel that love may never pass their way, so they allow themselves to put up with substandard behaviour from others and even engage in surface relationships where they can avoid making a commitment.
The Beatles once sang “all we need is love, ” Tina Turner sang “What’s love got to do with it?” Love is the universal force which holds the very fabric of life together and is certainly what makes the world go around.
A journey into the self is the only way we can truly learn to appreciate the beautiful gestures that love gifts us with. A journey into exploring who we are, how to love ‘ME’ or re-learn how to love ‘ME’ again and in the process learning how to draw RESPECT from that journey. Once we learn to love ourselves and realise that we deserve the highest possible best and outcome for our lives in and with the intention of love then we are sure to be presented with the most nourishing and honest friendships and relationships.
I have been doing much reflecting of late in terms of how I interact with my world and the bigger world around me. In terms of my friendships and relationships I realise that for any decision I make for my life and what I expect from others has to come down to how I ultimately feel about myself and what I deserve and on that basis, how I feel about myself will then reflect back at me from my world around me. The basis therefore for all this is based on my belief in the following:
• Honesty and integrity
• Good open communication
• How my children perceive me and how my actions affect them
Good communication is extremely important. It cuts out having to make assumptions and second guessing. It also enriches and enhances the relationship and in effect, taking the time to nurture and honor them is therefore a reflection of our beliefs. I have very few friends and that is by choice. There are a few I speak to every day and others who touch base a few times a month, yet we are ok with this because we know we are busy yet still remain in each others thoughts and we respect each other for this honesty.
In life there are codes of conduct in terms of how we conduct ourselves. Those codes of conduct help align us to how we operate in terms of our values and beliefs.
Also more importantly about Love and Respect is that I always think how I would feel if someone treated my child dis-respectfully or even if my child did the same to someone. Yet also how would they feel if I behaved inappropriately (as at home we have a set of standards ) if I allowed or settled for substandard treatment from anyone, or gave of the same, then how would my children see me as a mother, someone they have looked up to for so long, someone they have depended upon? And then how would that affect their perception of relationships of what is or is not acceptable?
Remember we cannot speak about love or of love and sincerely mean it, if our actions belie otherwise. Love cannot just be spoken about. It is something that is felt, and if it is felt then it is to be experienced and once experienced then an action is formed from that. Remember: All We need is love. Think about it!!
